Loving yourself inside out

“Hey, that’s a cute top, but it’s too tight for you.”
“You’d look so much better if you’d just exercise/ go on a diet/ lose weight/ skip meals.”
“Why does your skin look like that?”

Have you ever heard words like that spoken to you? Maybe it sounded like advice, but you didn’t feel enlightened or helped by those words.

Unsolicited advice, especially the ones about the way we look, happens to most of us. Yes, celebs too! Sometimes, when we hear comments about our physical appearances, it can be hurtful and confusing. I mean, I’ve always liked the way I look. But do I look weird to others?

But we’re not alone! Even famous peeps who go through the same thing and have more than a word or two to hit those critics back. Some give polite and gracious replies, while others may take a more ferocious bite!

Selena Gomez killing them with kindness

When it comes to self-love and confidence, Selena knows a thing or two. After leaving the spotlight in 2013, the media speculated her hiatus as a check-in into rehab. But, like??? The truth is she was diagnosed with life-threatening lupus and even had to go through chemo!

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Instead of hitting back every single rumour, she chose kindness for herself, as she took this break to recuperate physically and build her confidence.

Today, she’s better than ever, celebrating mental health with Rare Impact, supported by her highly-rated makeup line.


Zendaya educated critics about crowning glory 

AKA MJ, Zendaya has had her share of critics saying the meanest things, from being too skinny to having hair smelling like weed. Yup, we’re talking about hair shaming.

Back in 2015, this beautiful queen graced the Oscars red carpet with locs, a hairstyle traditionally worn by African-Americans. One of the Fashion Police (oh, the irony!) hosts famously said Zendaya’s locks look like they smell of weed.

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Being the epitome of grace on the red carpets and social media, Zendaya gave an educational reply on the importance of representation for African-Americans and the hairstyle they don. To top it off, she also included a long list of accomplished African-Americans who share a commonality with her: they wear locs.


TXT Yeonjun let his buddies do the talking

Meet TXT’s angel and devil of Body -shaming. Think men are spared the pain of unwelcomed words? Think again! One troll commented during a recent live session with fans, “Yeonjun, you’re chubby”. While Yeonjun did appear offended, the angriest one was Soobin hit back hard and supported his fellow teammate.

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“Whenever you feel like leaving such comments, take a look at yourself first. Seriously. Really.”

Like many other K-pop artists, TXT work extremely hard to stay in shape! At the end of the day, such hurtful comments only make the commenter look bad. Also, the brotherhood in TXT is solid!


Ailee owning the night and happiness

It all began with noodles. This talent songstress shared a quick vid on cooking easy-peasy noodles with prawns and sesame. Turned out she also torched the troll!

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A commenter told Ailee she’d gain weight after her supper. She simply responded, “Even if I gain weight, my happiness is all that matters!” How’s that for taking control?


The lens we look through: Schemas

Wonder why we feel the way we do whenever we receive specific comments or even say these things? That can be easily explained with schemas!

Think of schemas as an IG filter or goggles we all wear. This bit of filter affects the way we process and understand information. And, of course, everyone has lenses or filters. This is what makes us different and unique!

What another person says to you is not always the truth but rather shows what goes on in that individuals head. Some times a comment about something like weight, looks and grades could be a reflection of what really bugs this person, such as a personal fear or a sense of inadequacy in that area.

While we may not always agree on the same things, it is essential to have an open mind and heart to listen and learn. A passing remark can have a lasting impact, so let’s be mindful of our words and actions while loving ourselves too.

Share this article with someone who has been shamed or received negative comments.


Image credit: @selenagomez, Getty Images, Elle, Global Interpark


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