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Taylor Swift, how we become Anti-heroes and why we hate ourselves.


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Video: Taylor Swift -Anti-Hero ( Official Music Video)

Midnight, that dreaded time when our thoughts run wild with everything that we shouldn’t be thinking about. While the album ‘Midnight’ is again a self-confession, like a surgeon, Dr Taylor Swift’s lyrics cut deep into us to reveal our deepest fears, guilt and shame. Why do we hate ourselves so much? More importantly, what do we do, now that we see all that has been festering inside of us?

Guilt – All the people that I’ve ghosted.

Nobody is perfect. For most people that statement runs like calming balm at the back of our minds when we make blunders. However, when the clock strikes twelve, ‘that incident’ will creep up to remind us about how stupid or uncaring we were, or what a failure we are. When nothing is done to positively unpack and process those thoughts, replaying a negative thought can cause a downward emotional and psychological spiral. Read here to understand those self-condemning thoughts.

However, while we admit that everyone makes mistakes, it’s important that we recognise if we have actually  harmed someone else with our words or actions. Making amends is the best start of self-forgiveness.

 

Rejection- Feeling like that monster on the hill

Whether it’s being cancelled on social media or left out in a group setting, being rejected is a painful experience. And the pain is real! Brain imaging has shown that social and psychological pain overlaps with the part of the brain that processes physical pain. So, while it’s totally legit to feel sorry for ourself if we have been ostracised, it’s good not to let those emotions fester. There are many things we can do to sooth that pain and heal from rejection. Give ourselves some time to feel the emotions then think objectively about why we have been rejected in a particular situation and do some self-evaluation. Here’s more about healing from rejection.

 

Self-fulfilling Prophecy – Everyone agrees

Yes, it’s exhausting always rooting for the anti-hero. If the whole world seem to agree that we are the black sheep and the villain, sometimes even the most self-assured person can cave in. Self-Fulfilling Prophecy is a psychological phenomenon when a person believes so much in what other people say about themselves to the point that they actually act like what is said about them. What is said about them may be completely false. But if a person accepts it as the truth, they will believe that it is true and begin to behave according to the false believe.

We don’t have to be defined by what other’s say about us or fall victim to their words. Click here to know what we can do to challenge those words and get rid of those wrong believes about ourselves.

 

Here’s some help out of that Anti-hero suit

Automatic negative thoughts

Self-condemnation

Self-forgiveness

How to heal from rejection

Challenge negative words and thoughts

Defuse wrong believes about ourselves

 

Need to talk to someone?

 

 

Photos: Taylor Swift -Anti-Hero ( Official Music Video)

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