Offensive social behavior, to call-out or call-in

Tiktok has been trending with reaction to unpleasant people, situations and subjects. What can we do about it.

Have you ever been in a situation where you were really ticked off by offensive people?

Picture sitting at a social gathering or with some friends and someone nearby lets out a rude comment.

“This isn’t what I ordered… ( screaming at the waiter) Are you deaf?”


“Wah, so fat and wearing something so revealing!”


” Why are you behaving so dumb, do you have mental problems?

Yes, those words do reveal a glaringly obvious flaw in the offensive person’s personality.

Now, what do you do?

Photo via @soupytime on TikTok

The Tiktok trend

In this TikTok video format, people use the sound that narrates the following thought in your head:

“Okay, I don’t like this conversation or this person, but I feel like I’m hiding it pretty well though. Thank God.”

And then, a split second video reveals the user’s thinly-veiled disgust. The facial expressions of TikTok users of this sound have allowed viewers to feel, in a big way, seen.

The real life experience

No one wants to sit through and tolerate people they don’t like. But what if this was a friend of a friend? A sibling of a best friend? A partner of a sibling? A distant relative during a reunion?

Yiks, what do we do? Put our personal grievances aside and put on our best poker face during a social situation?

In these moments, excusing yourself from the table or looking at them with horror in your eyes could send some signals about their unkind behavior.

Photo via @soupytime on TikTok. 

Whether in a real-life social setting or in social media, we will meet unbecoming behavior that deserves to be called-out. What is calling-out and is there another way?

There are actually different ways to approach such a situation.


Calling-out is to bring to public attention, the harmful words or behavior of an individual, group or organisation.

Often calling-in is a harsh, public rebuttal to stop micro-aggression and hurtful behavior

A more compassionate approach is Calling-in, which is to have a serious conversation to friends who are displaying negative and harmful behavior.

Calling -in

Calling-in is to bring attention to the harmful words and behavior of people, groups of organisations,  that are biased, prejudiced and discriminatory in a private setting.

Here’s how you decide whether to call-out or call-in


Here more on how to deal with tricky social media situations:

Keeping boundaries to keep yourself safe




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