Delicious In Dungeon: a better way of looking at things.



Delicious in Dungeons, is story about 3 characters in a quest to find a mysterious golden kingdom in a dungeon island. In their journey, Laios Touden, leader and swordsman, Chilchuck Tims, a halflin locksmith, and Marcille Donato, an elven spellcaste, encounter not only battle monsters in the dungeon but also the conflicts amongst the threesome.


Marcille was hurt by the insinuation that she would be a burden to the party. As a result, she became reckless trying to prove her worth. She ended up in a precarious position by trying to capture big bats to harvest mandrakes on her own. What Marcille experienced is unfortunately part and parcel of daily life where negative experiences are common occurrences.


Cognitive reappraisal is helpful in these situations, allowing us to change how we think about them. Tchiki Davis, MA, PhD says that when we change the way we think about our experiences, we become less affected by the punches life throws at us. Instead, we can shift our perspective to see challenges as opportunities, focus on our strengths and overcome. In addition, when we become adept at reappraising, we are better able to manage our negative emotions and experience happiness even during difficult times.


Here are three things you can do to help yourself reappraise the situation:


1. Take a step back


Experiencing heightened emotions like shame and worthlessness can tempt us to rush recklessly towards proving ourselves like Marcille did. This can cloud our judgment and the ability to evaluate the situation objectively and figure out our next steps.

When you feel overwhelmed in such situations, try using the RAIN technique is a mindfulness approach developed by Tara Brach, a well- known psychologist, to regulate your emotions before doing anything else.


R – Recognize what is going on

This involves consciously acknowledging your thoughts, feelings and behaviors.


A – Allow the experience to be there

Simply let your thoughts, emotions, feelings and behaviors be, and resist the urge to fix or avoid them.


I – Investigate with interest and care

Deepen your natural curiosity and desire to know the truth. Direct focused attention to your present experience and bodily sensations. For example, you can ask yourself “What am I believing?” and “What do I need most?”


N – Nurture with self-compassion

Self-compassion develops when we fully acknowledge we are suffering. Nurturing our inner lives with self-care and patience is the essence of self-compassion.


2. Examine the evidence



Chilchuck’s words that affected Marcille were “acting tough isn’t helping one bit, you’ll just end up really hurting yourself, and then you’ll be a burden on the party.” While his words could have been better chosen and kinder in tone, they were of caution and not accusation. Marcille’s feelings were still valid, but they blinded her to other interpretations of what Chilchuck said.

Examining the evidence isn’t about proving who is right or wrong. Rather, it helps bring clarity to why the emotions you feel have arisen and help you consider the other possible perspectives.


3. Reach out



After Laios explained to Marcille that her skills in wielding magic were better applied in the deeper dungeons, she began to understand her worth in the party.

Sometimes it’s hard to reason out these situations on our own. And there’s no shame if we face struggle doing so. When in doubt, reach out to your support network of trusted individuals who can reflect on this with you and give you honest and kind feedback.


Here are some Shadee.Care articles on related topics:


Managing Emotions

Growth Mindset

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